My Name is Cameron, Not Cam.

I sometimes resent having a name that can be so easily shortened. My name is Cameron, and almost without fail, people I meet will start calling me Cam. It’s as if the extra syllable in “Cameron” is too much to bear.

Technically, my name has three syllables if you pronounce it the way my mother does: Cam-er-on. I’ve grown accustomed to the common two-syllable version, Cam-ron, and even introduced myself that way. But “Cam” is not my name. It’s an entirely different name. There are people whose birth certificates actually say Cam, and you’ll never hear anyone try to lengthen their name to Cameron. We only ever seem to shorten names, never the other way around.

This isn’t just about my own preference. Take Cameron Ward, the rookie NFL quarterback. Most people know him as Cam Ward, and he has said publicly that he doesn’t mind which name people use. When I first heard about him, I also called him Cam, assuming it was his given name, until a quick search showed me his mother named him Cameron. His acceptance of the nickname highlights the central issue: you simply don’t know what a person prefers until you ask.

For the most part, people mean no harm when they shorten my name. But the assumption is frustrating. There have been many times when I’ve politely corrected someone, only to have them forget moments later. They’ll use “Cameron” once or twice, then slide right back into calling me Cam. It’s as if they hear others using the nickname and feel a social pressure to conform rather than respecting my request.

For most of my life, my friends have called me Cam. Growing up, I was fond of nicknames. In high school and college, nicknames felt like a bond. That someone thought of a personal reference to me. But as a grown man in the workforce, giving me unsolicited nicknames is disrespectful.

But take the example set by a coworker, who is also my fraternity brother. On my first day at my job in 2021, he asked me a simple question: “What name do you go by?” I told him Cameron, and he has called me Cameron ever since.

That small gesture had a huge impact. It was a sign of respect that made him stand out as one of the most mature people in the office, because no one else had bothered to ask. Well, one other person did but they got it wrong. They asked me if I went by Dwight or Cam. Dwight is my first name. I’m a junior and go by my middle name. Yet, my middle name is not Cam though I appreciated the attempt.

My coworker’s example taught me never to assume what name another person uses. It’s baffling how often this basic courtesy is ignored, even when my name (Cameron) is written plainly in my email signature.

One coworker is named Benjamin, but in his signature block, it says Ben because that is what he prefers. Yet, nobody calls him Benjamin. Maybe people didn’t recognize his signature block and called him Ben anyway. Who knows.

So why don’t more people ask this simple question? Perhaps they don’t want to be corrected, as a correction creates an obligation. When you tell someone what to call you, you are asking for a basic level of respect, and maybe some people feel uncomfortable being told what to do.

Whatever the reason, the solution is simple. A person’s name is the foundation of their identity. Taking a moment to ask which one they prefer is a small effort that shows a great deal of respect. It’s a courtesy that everyone deserves.

And lastly, I don’t have to keep the same energy for everybody. If you see me around my childhood friends and my college friends, then you will hear them call me Cam, and I’m cool with that. We go way back, and they have that privilege.